Experts tell us whether we should “poor boys and rich girls”
Since ancient times, “poor children and rich girls” have been the “golden rule” of raising children.
Girls have noble qi, boys have ambition, is it still applicable today?
According to the survey, 80% of parents think that this view of tutoring makes sense.
But everyone also suggested that the times have changed, and the ancient teachings have to be “adapted”!
But how to change face to apply to current children?
Parents have heated discussions and different opinions. Which school do you support?
Pros: The ancient teaching is reasonable, and the demand for a son is stricter!
In the survey, a considerable number of parents agreed with this type of parenting.
Although living conditions are much richer today, men as the main pillars of society and family have not changed.
Therefore, in contrast, parents will have stricter requirements on their sons and pay more attention to the cultivation of strong will and survivability, so that they can take up the role of head of the family in the future.
“And the daughter is the intimate little cotton jacket, which is born to pet.” Most parents can’t help but “soften” the demands of their daughter’s coquettishness.
Netizens “Love is like flowing water” believes that “boys who are too coddled will become weak and lose their male qualities.
Girls are rich, and they will not grow up in front of Ronghua Fugui when they grow up. Of course, they should also pay attention to guidance. Don’t develop a snob or a parasite that just wants to enjoy it.
“And the parents are a little more straightforward.” Of course the girl must be rich, or she will be abducted without a gimmick! ”
And the boy really needs to be poor, and grow up to be hardworking and responsible.
“Radicals: Men and women alike, should be” poorly raised “!
”Most families now have only one child. Both men and women attach great importance to it, but this does not mean that they must be spoiled. Although the conditions are good, it is necessary to cultivate children’s hardship and self-care ability.
“Netizens” cultivating clouds and fishing for the moon “believes that regardless of whether they are daughters or sons, they should be properly” poor. ”
Parents “Longlong Stone” instilled in their children the thought of “little richness and frugality” from a young age, and paid great attention to the cultivation of saving habits.; The first poem to learn is “Compassionate Farmers”; the rice grains scattered on the table made him pick it up.
“My netizen” Mizuki / mn “proposed that she is now a baby. Her life is relatively rich, but she still needs to let her know the hardships of her parents.life.
“Practical faction: No intentional difference, just what you can!
In the eyes of most people, the meaning of “poor nutrition” and “rich nutrition” has gone beyond the meaning of money itself, and is more of a quality cultivation.
However, there are still a few parents who believe that the rich or poor is not entirely determined by the parents ‘wishes. This is also limited by the specific circumstances of each family’s economic strength, membership, and personal qualities.” In practical operations, we can do our bestJust do it.
“The parent” Ai Xiaodou “thought,” This old concept is too absolute. Raising children is actually very simple. Regardless of whether a boy or a girl is beneficial to the development of the child, the parents will try to give the child the best they can afford.
“The netizen” Huahua “also said frankly,” You don’t need to deliberately distinguish between the concepts of poor and rich, as long as you ‘teach it naturally’ based on your child ‘s actual situation.
“Rebels: The conditions are” rich “, and” poor support “cannot be achieved!
In the article “born in sorrow, died in peace”, there is a saying: “Bitterness is his mind, his muscles are hungry, his body is hungry, his body is empty, his actions are disturbed by his actions.”Sex, Zeng Yiqi couldn’t, “thus taking on the big task!
However, in today’s family of one-child families who have no worries, few people are willing to train their children in this way.
In the survey, the specific “poor parenting” method was mentioned, and the interviewed parents only stayed on small things like “let the children learn to save” and “do their own thing”.
”It is supported in theory, but it is difficult to implement in practice. Now that the condition is ‘rich’, no matter how ‘poor’ a child is, ‘poor’ cannot go anywhere!
“Parent” Sasa “laughed,” As such a treasure in the palm, I really do not want to let the child be too hard, there are delicious and fun at home, adults must give it to him.
“I mentioned frustration education, and netizen” Dingding “was helpless to his son.
“现在我儿子动不动就说，‘妈，这事我做不了，你来做吧’，主要是爷爷奶奶从小包办太多了，现在他一遇到困难就逃避，我都不知道该怎么改变他了……” 专家也来说两句 看着家长七嘴八舌，三位专家也加入了讨论阵营。They believe that the times have changed and the meanings given to them have also changed.
“Since ancient times, many talents have suffered, but the younger brother Shao Weinan” has a deeper and newer connotation in the age of material richness.
What exactly is “poor nutrition” and “rich nutrition”?
In terms of child rearing, how should parents grasp the degree between them?
Let’s first get out of the shackles of the “authorities” and listen to the rational speech of early education experts as “bystanders”. Professor Chen Mingxing: The material is rich, and children need to be “poor”!
I agree with the second widely accepted view that men and women are the same and should be ‘poorly raised’.
According to the conditions of being “rich” and not “poor”, I can’t agree with them. These parents can learn about Bill Gates and Li Jiacheng’s “poor support” for their children, which may be instructive.
This is an era of drastic changes in the structure of the family and society. Some people have suggested that “the rich is not a generation,” and now that they are mostly “only children,” the requirements for children are: they can only succeed but not fail.
Coupled with the increasing participation of women in social activities, the times have given women more social obligations and responsibilities, which have become the basis for both men and women to “poorly support”.
How to “poorly raise”?
Parents first teach their children to do two things: first, take the initiative, speak loudly, and watch everyone say hello; second, do their own things.
”These two things look like small furs, but they actually have deep meanings and effects.
其一是从小养成礼貌待人，自信阳光的性格，并且积极互动;其二是去除现在普遍存在的‘过保护’现象，孩子在自我学习过程中，意志力、抗挫能力、情绪控制能力都Can be cultivated.
“Today’s society is not a competition for knowledge, even a competition for quality.
In fact, the key is to cultivate children’s good living habits and integrity.
The classic “Disciples of the Disciples” tells us incisively how to be a person first and then something.
“The first filial piety, the second sincere letter, love all the people, and the relatives, have the strength to learn the text.”
The word “teaching” in education means that filial piety comes first, and our old ancestors are very intelligent.
Expert Su Ling: Girls have noble spirits, boys have ambitions!
In modern society, the material is abundant, and parents must correctly understand and implement “poor support”.
”Poverty” does not make him hungry or frozen, but restricts his children in terms of materiality. Only when he grows up can he cherish and struggle. Furthermore, parents may have enough ability for their children to enjoy, but still have to cultivate hardship from an early ageFrugal habits and tough character.
With this concept, it will be much easier to implement it concretely. Depending on the age of the child, you can choose whether to let the nanny prepare breakfast for this every day, or let him get up early, fry an egg, and hot cup of milk; it is a trolley.Pick up or drop off, let him go to school by bus; buy an ordinary schoolbag, or a high-end trolley bag; give or not give pocket money, give more or less; live in a common dormitory or a high-level apartment when you go to college . According to reports,In Hunan, a pair of parents who had been very successful in business chose to sell all their properties and become their own sixteen. In order to train their already habitual children, the seven-year-old child lied about bankruptcy and took the child back to his rural hometown to plantThe true story of the land may be a great inspiration to parents.
In my opinion, “Boy raising poorly” highlights frustration education, focusing on the cultivation of will, and raising “spirituality”; and “Girl richly raising” highlights investment in cultural cultivation, emphasizing temperament, and fostering”Expensive”.
The happiness of modern families also lies in whether they are “poor” or “rich”, as long as you have the right idea, you can do it easily.
Expert Xie Qiaoju: “Poor support” is not difficult, parents should be appropriate “slacking”!
In the survey, some parents stated that it is easier said than done for “poor” children.
In fact, I think that it is not difficult to raise children poorly. The key lies in whether the mentality of parents can be changed.
Too many parents always refuse to be lazy and have poor self-care ability. In fact, it is often because parents are too “hard-working”.
When the child reaches the age of learning to eat, the parents ca n’t see the wolf who is full of the table, and finally ca n’t help but feed. The child picks up a toy for a long time and looks at the mess.
”Poorly raised” children are first reflected in letting them do their own things. In a simple sentence, quite a few parents have difficulty insisting.
Therefore, parents should “slack off” appropriately in the process of “poorly raising” their children, and must learn to endure their imperfections and wait for their children to do things better.
In addition, today’s only children are generally more self-assertive, and parents have to learn to retain their children in the details of their lives.
The child should be “ten”, and the parents should give “six or seven points”, but not exceed “eight.”
For example, take it to the supermarket to buy food. Don’t buy everything along with your child. Don’t eat it all at once when you return home. Teach your child to learn restraint, frugality and moderate consumption.